So near yet so far

I've never spoken to you for so long on the phone before, it feels great.. But everytime i realise after a converation with you, I also feel the sense of regrets for telling you too much and letting you know what's on my mind too much. I'm glad we could talk but i'm also regretting of letting you know too much information.

I'm sorry if once again i pressure you.

The fear of losing you is now greater compared to previous times because the closer i get to you the more i fear the decision making day.

I apologize for being so selfish in wanting a specified time, but if i don't do that we all will get hurt further and i hope you understand.

We're always so near yet so far, it seems you're just right next to me and yet you're not. Sometimes it even feels real that you are there for me but I often wonder whether is it an illusion of the heart that it wants to see.

But no matter what it is, I hope we could talk it out and once again be there for each other again.
Because at the end of the day, you are still a friend that's very close to the heart.

No matter what happens, i'm glad you've at least once considered me, and i really appreciate that and by thinking of that sometimes cures fear by a little.

And I honestly am glad that these decisions are being thought of for the long run and I once again apologize for putting the pressure on you.

Thank you.