Sigh~

I realised it's not easy mastering the art of staring-at-four-walls every night, or even speaking thoughts to myself or even just bumming around alone. I guess these are the days that i dread coming to me..

The days that there's nothing much to look forward to other than the same old lectures and tutorials. The group that i used to hang out with, everyday was just filled with laughter. Even though we run our own lifes but there would still be someone or something to look forward to...Suddenly now everything is dimmed down and what makes it harder is that i not only know these days are here to stay for the next 13 weeks, i also don't feel like opening to others much other than those i've known previously. I definitely hope that the motivation that drives me doing better and better every semester also dont die down on me.. Sigh..

I always try to smile to brighten one's day, and someone once told me dont force to smile but smile because i feel like it. Now a smile is only there when it's necesary.

Worries are filling up within, over issues that i dont want to mention. There's nothing i could do, crying wouldn't help either, other than just try and keep on trying .. ..

Some would say: "why not talk to your boyfriend?? they're always a plan B to everything else..."

but i dont want him to be a plan B and there should be no reason to throw all my worries and self-inflicted depression to him .. let's just say it's not fair! I tried but it made both of us unhappy too..

to make things worse, people around me arent' very optimistic too .. there are not many happy vibes everywhere..

SIGH~

i hope 13 weeks ends quick and the sun in my "world" would shine much brighter than today..